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A Solo Travel Introvert? 7 Tips to Somewhat Social Solo Travel

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I've traveled exotic places like India, challenging places like Patagonia, iconic cities like New York and London... and yes, I'm an introvert. Here I'm in Hamburg, Germany.

I’ve traveled exotic places like India, challenging places like Patagonia, iconic cities like New York and London… and yes, I’m an introvert. Here I’m in Hamburg, Germany.

Being an introvert and being a solo traveler are not mutually exclusive.

I know because I am a solo travel introvert.

At a recent dinner, five long-term women friends and I somehow got onto discussing Myers Briggs assessments. And yes, I mentioned that I was an introvert. Despite having known these women for 10 years and more, a few heads swerved my way.

They had become used to my solo travels and had lost their knowledge of me as an introvert. After a short pause they remembered when they first met me and there were nods and “oh ya”.

Yes, solo travel may seem to be for those enormously confident extroverts who would naturally bound out into the world, but there are many, many solo travel introverts as well. In fact it may be that introverts actually outnumber the extroverts. But in the emails and comments I’ve received, it seems that introverts are also often hesitant to go solo. They are concerned about being too alone.

solo travel introvert

This is Noemie. I met her on the Navimag ferry to Patagonia. She, along with over 150,000 other solo travelers is a member of the Solo Travel Society on Facebook – many of whom are introverts.

As a Solo Travel Introvert You Can Learn the Ways of an Extrovert

I believe that solo travel is very suited to those of us who like our quiet time. Really, what’s better for an introvert than to travel alone. Time to yourself for your own interests and the joy of your own pace are luxuries for the introverted.

Plus, as one grows we also learn skills that are not necessarily natural to us – yet we can be okay with them. In my case I learned the skills of being an extrovert from my late husband through I didn’t know I had until I traveled alone. By traveling solo I exercise these skills so that I can draw on them when needed. Yes, I believe that solo travel is perfect for introverts. If you want to develop the skills of extroverts, here are my tips.

solo travel introvert

I often check out Meetup.com when I’m visiting a city. In Hong Kong I (temporarily) joined a hiking group.

7 Tips to Travel Like an Extrovert – if that’s what you want

The important thing to note is that while the tips below will put you into social situations they are not permanent situations. They may last a day or an hour – it’s up to you. I’m not suggesting that you live all your travels in an extroverted fashion. After all, a solo travel introvert needs some time to her or himself as well. But for your social needs, here you go.

  1. Book your accommodation according to how social you want to be. It’s not hard to book a hotel and keep to yourself but to book a place to stay that may introduce you to others takes a little thought. How social do you want to be? Perhaps an independently owned inn is right where you can have some interaction with the owners. Or maybe a B&B or hostel is better where you may have more interaction with other travelers as well. Get the details in advance. Some B&Bs actually operate like inns with separate breakfast tables rather than communal ones. If that’s what you want, great. If not, find another.
  2. Try slow travel. If you stay at the same B&B, inn or hostel for a week rather than a couple of nights, you will find yourself entering a bit of a social scene. As you’re seen again and again, people will naturally start talking with you. They’ll be curious about you, your travels, what you did that day… It can make for pleasant chats of a few minutes or much more.
  3. Take a class. Classes – cooking, language, art… – will put you in a social situation with a purpose. Everyone attending will have a shared interest. You will have something in common with them making conversation easy as you discuss the whats and whys of the class.
  4. Join a Meetup, even for a day. I’m a member of meetup.com but I don’t use it at home. When I’m going to a city I check out the meetups for that city and join one or two that interest me and have events planned for when I’m there. I did this in Hong Kong and it nearly killed me. Not really. Read: Meetup.com Got me Hiking in Hong Kong: And it was #$@&%*! hard!
  5. Take a short tour. Day tours, half or full days, are great ways to get a little social time. But you may also want to consider a short tour of a few days at the beginning of your trip. In addition to putting you in a social situation it can offer an introduction to a new destination. Take a short tour to learn how to navigate the country/city, its culture and currency. It will give you the confidence to then spend more time there on your own.
  6. Make good use of the lobby, common room or lounge. Don’t read while you’re in a common space. That’s like hanging up a sign that says “don’t talk to me.” Instead, people-watch and enjoy the scene. Eventually something will happen that will open up a conversation for you.
  7. Repeat. If you are staying in one place for a while,  go to the same coffee shop, green grocers, pub or restaurant consistently. You’ll be noticed as a new regular and people will eventually chat with you. This happened to me in the Lake District of England. I went to the same pub for four nights in a row. It was a really tiny pub. Yes I felt awkward the first night. But less and less so each consecutive night. And then, on the fourth, which happened to be Guy Fawkes Night, I walked into the pub and it erupted to greet me. I was like Norm walking into Cheers – if you remember the show.

So those are my tips. What are yours? Please share your advice in the comments so that another solo traveler introvert can benefit from your experience.

Travel cheers!

Janice

Last updated: 14th February, 2016

  • That’s the great thing about traveling: no one knows you, and you can try out parts of your personality that people at home rarely see. No one knows how shy you usually are, or how clumsy you might feel. Just smile and say something to stranger, for example about the beautiful sight you’re both looking at, or chat with someone at breakfast. If you act normal about it, people will respond to that in tune.
    You will notice soon enough if someone’s up for a chat or not. If not, never take it personally. The other person may simply be in need of some alone time, or may not be a morning person, or may be dealing with something sad that happened, or who knows what. Just try the next person.

  • The part about reading a book coming across as a sign “don’t talk to me” never worked for me, even when I wanted it to! Loads of people have interrupted my reading because they wanted to chat. While I’m sitting on a park bench, or on an outdoor terrace, or in a hostel common room, or even at home during my lunch break from work (even if I go an hour later than all the rest). People always come chat with me. Sometimes it’s because they seem to think that I’m so ‘poor and lonely’ with my book and that I NEED conversation. (You know, when they go: “Ohh, you’re reading.” (Yeah I know.) And then they hang around, saying more things, interrupting your reading… they feel like they are saving me from loneliness, I simply feel interrupted.)

    At times it has lead to nice conversations. At other times, I’ve had to chase horny men away by stating I just wanted to read my book, or I’ve had to leave because I didn’t want to be rude to people, but really just wanted to read.

  • thank you for the lots of information . As I am adventurious I like solo travel. Also these 7 tips are awesome and effictive. Among these tips i like tip no5 because of the information of Day tours, half or full days.

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  • Jody Grombach

    Thanks for writing just for us introverts! I enjoy using airbnb when I travel. I love the intimacy of staying in someone’s home. Most hosts are open to as much or as little interaction as the guest wants, so, you kind of have the best of both worlds: Privacy as you need it, and interaction as you want it. I recently landed in an airbnb home in Half Moon Bay, CA on election night. My hosts and I bonded immediately over tea and fresh scones as we talked about the ensuing election results and all the implications. It was comforting and interesting, too! The next morning, they invited me to join them on an epic early morning hike along the bluffs to witness the Mavericks ~ a particular ocean occurrence that causes great swells and brings the local surfers out in droves. I stayed with these hosts for one night on either end of my trip, and we are now friends for life. This was a solo road trip along the central coast of California, and while I had all the joys of traveling alone and making random stops along the way, I found myself having really satisfying random encounters with people everywhere I went ~ whether walking the trails along the coast, exploring redwood groves, or stopping for lunch. As an introvert, I find solo travel feeds my soul, and, typically provides some of the most exciting social encounters of my life.

  • wvlinz

    Yes, another solo travel introvert here–good tips! Regarding tours, I highly recommend the free walking tours offered in many major cities, only cost is a tip for the guide. And hostels–nobody bothers you if you want time to yourself, but there’s almost always someone to talk to if you feel like it.

  • Lois O.

    Thank you! I look forward to reading and learning!

  • Sounds wonderful. In Scotland I met fellow who blogs about perfume. Here’s his blog http://www.monsieurguerlain.com Maybe it will be of interest to you.

  • Lois O.

    I do so wrestle with my nature. I love to hide behind my camera or sunglasses! Your list is spot on!. Going back to France for a month and signed up for a course in perfume! It’s 2 hours a day over 3 days, all with the same group. I will mostly stay in airbnbs , but I think I will treat myselt to a few nights in a hotel…a little of this…a little of that!

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  • Thanks Kathy!

  • The art school was word of mouth; I found the Malta conservation project via World Volunteers; the gig in Baiardo (near San Remo) was from a site called Idealist.org; the others were a mix of HelpX and Wwoofing.

  • The art school was word of mouth – but that got me started. I found the Malta conservation project via World Volunteers, then the gig in Baiardo (behind San Remo) via a site called Idealist.org; the others were either via Wwoofing or HelpX.. There is another site that I haven’t tried called Workaway — maybe for the next trip. I’ve done one volunteer stint in Australia — a conservation project in the Kimberley, that was via a University in Perth.

  • These sound like fantastic experiences. How did you find all these opportunities?

  • Kathy Gates

    Some great tips there, which I look forward to trying out on my next travels. There’s one that I’d like to add and that is volunteering — and I don’t mean super long term or paid ‘volunteerism’. I took a mid-life gap year back in 2007-2008 and went to Europe. A friend mentioned an art school in Tuscany that takes volunteers and that started me off. I also did a two week stint in a cultural association north of San Remo, Wwoofing in Puglia, Taormina and also southern Spain. I spent 2 months on a conservation project in Malta (something dear to my heart) and also time in a vineyard in southern England. I found that these were great opportunities to meet the locals and get to know a place. Most experiences were positive; the few that were not made great anecdotes.

  • I think I am 65% introvert and 35% extrovert. I do agree that solo travel is good for introverts cause they naturally tend to be quite and they love being alone. Choosing the right type of accommodation is imperative but you may not know whether is right for you. So I’ve learnt to book a hostel for a few days only and then eventually extend my stay or move to a more private accommodation like airbnb. On long term solo travel I would suggest house sitting as it offers the perfect combination, great for introvert solo travellers who love to connect to the neighbourhood and be part of the community. I loved it and can highly recommend it to all introverts solo travellers who want to be social. 🙂

  • Good point Wayne. These tips can certainly be practiced/enjoyed at home as well as while traveling.

  • Laia

    Thanks Janice for these tips!
    While I traveled alone I met a lot of people in the accommodation (mainly in hostels and guesthouses), but also in the transport (specially in Asia where I looked very different from locals). In South America, since I speak Spanish, I got to talk to locals working in shops… just by saying “hola” and smiling when I entered the shop they started talking to me and telling me stories about their life or the place I was visiting.
    I think the most important to meet people (in case we feel like it) is to be open and attentive to others, and smile.

  • your tips and stories are always positive, thank you Janice. You never judge another traveler who does NOT want to couch surf or stay in a dorm room with 6 strangers. We ALL travel differently.
    Sometimes solo travel requires a bit of ‘acting’.
    From the time I step off the plane (or boat) I try to ‘be the outgoing person in my mind’.
    Always ask questions of the person you are speaking with, showing interest in them. What a difference the response is when you ask something that not involves directions.
    Shopping in a local market on some of my extended travel, starts a small ‘friendship’ with a local.
    And I have stayed in University housing during a summer…………although being the oldest person in the building, it was a ‘community’ that may be easy to join into.

  • Hey Janice, these are great tips. Thanks!

    I am an introvert and it is my goal to venture on a solo trip after the trip to Taiwan with my girlfriend this year.

    I am into slow travel so I am glad that it is going to help with socializing during the upcoming solo trip.

    Another tip that I can add is to start practicing all the tips above even when you are not traveling. Becoming a regular at a local cafe or coworking space, join meetups and taking classes are all things an introvert can do in their home city to get social juices flowing.

    This blog post resonated with me a lot and I’m gonna share it on Twitter. I’m sure it’s gonna help many more travelers who are also introverts out there! 🙂

  • Very nice to read this! I always have known I’m an introvert, but I never really considered how it played into my long term travelling these days. But it makes perfect sense. These are great tips. It’s definitely important to book the right accommodations. Tripadvisor offers hostels and hotels ranked highly by solo travellers which has guided me well in the past.

  • Thank you for the tips. As an introvert, I do sometimes hesitate to put myself out there, but it can lead to new and interesting experiences.

  • Honeybrown1976

    Great tips! Thank you. I’ll apply them on my next trip in September.

  • Knowing yourself is important and yes, get ahead of being lonely before it gets ahead of you. Thanks!
    j

  • These are great! I’ve done a few of them already, but I’ll have to remember these new tips for the future. I’ve only ever tried Meetup in a place where I’ve been living. It’s interesting that you only use it for when you are traveling.

    I find knowing yourself and being aware of your own needs at all times is important. Like you point out with how you book accommodation, you have to know what you need and at what time and for how long. If you feel yourself starting to feel lonely, try to catch it early rather than going along for days or weeks before realizing that you’ve ended up in a rut. I’ve gotten a lot better about understanding my moods, and what causes them, and it’s helped a lot whether I’m traveling solo or with a friend!

  • These are so awesome! As an introverted solo traveler, I know just how it can feel being “too alone”. The easiest thing I’ve changed to try meet more people along the road is saying hello. It’s so simple, yet so powerful. Saying hi and giving someone a smile opens up so many doors and I’ve met so many amazing people through this simple shift.

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